How to network: 17 tips for shy people

“Then, when there is an opening, pose a question to the group,” says Handal. “You build your credibility by asking a question.” Bonus: For a shy person, asking a question may be much easier than launching into a speech or sharing an opinion.

Listen to be heard

One of the most profound points Carnegie made in How to Win Friends was that everyone loves to talk about themselves. For a shy person, more than for an extrovert, this is networking gold. Many people don’t listen when others talk: They might be quiet, but they are just waiting for a chance to talk again. If you are shy, listening is easier than talking. So become a good listener. Don’t ignore the conversation. Don’t wait in dread for the moment when you will have to talk. Listen. If you let people discuss their experiences and opinions — and listen with sincere interest — they will remember that they had a great conversation with you. And you didn’t have to say much at all.

Bring all your cards

“Always have business cards handy,” says Handal. “They’re an effective way for you to leave your name behind so people remember who you are.” This is especially true if you are shy. If networking doesn’t come naturally to you, don’t squander any of the contacts you make. If you came out of your shell and made a successful connection, however brief, don’t let it go to waste. You need to take advantage of every opportunity. Don’t wait for your new friend to ask for your card. They might not think of it. Just offer one and let them know it’s okay to reach out. Very likely, they will offer their card in return. And now you have made a solid, repeatable connection.